Homer and Superglue
by Def the best
Summary: What will happen with superglue and Homer Simpson collide? Lisa and Girl Scouts! Watch to find out.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer I don't own the simpsons. 

doo doo do doo doo doo doo doo doo do doo

Lisa I like ponies.  
Bart Ponies bad.  
Homer Doh doh ow i broke my pants  
Marge Lets sew you a new one HomerYayyyy superglue time  
After some screaming

Homer Marge I glued my pants to myself

Marge Why aren't you at work?  
Lisa I joined Girl Scouts. I am a Brownie.  
Homer MMMMMMMMMM brownies

after fantisizing about a land full of brownies that danced around

Lisa I'm going to sell my cookies. Where are they?  
Homer The dog ate them

Dog looks quizically at Homer

Homer Okay I ate them. but I wrote fake I.O.U.s  
Lisa That is what I will sell

After Lisa sells them all

Lisa A free trip to the American Indian Museum with my Dad! Woohoo!  
Homer Doh!

P.S. I know it is lame! I WILL GET BETTER!


	2. At the airport

Homer: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Lisa: Dad, what's wrong?

Homer: I dreamed we were in a terminal waiting to go to a place for Indians.

Lisa: Dad, we are going to the American Indian Mueseum.

Homer: I'm scared.

Lisa: Here is your superglue.

Homer: Yay! Superglue time!

Flight Attendant: No liquids because of terrorist activities.

Homer: I'll show you!

He glues the flight attendant's hand to the metal detector

Flight Attendant: Sir, come back now!

Homer: Never!

Lisa: Sorry about that! I'll try to catch him. Dad?

Homer: I must fly to safety!

He goes into the plane

Lisa: Dad the safest spot is seat 13B!

Homer: Ha! You'll wish you never told me that!

Homer sits down and buckles up. Lisa sits next to him.

Pilot: Time for takeoff.

Lisa: Time for tolerance!

Homer: What is that?

Lisa: Learning about others and respecting them.

Homer: Respect? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Next chapter mid-flight

Flight Attendant: Hello? Anyone there? Help!


	3. midflight

As Lisa and Homer were sitting in an airplane, Homr was squirming.

"Lisa," he said; "I have to go to the bathroom."

"Dad, I asked you five minutes ago if you had to!" LIsa exclaimed.

"But I didn't have to go then!" Homer whined.

"Then you have to wait until I have to go again," Lisa ordered.

"But everyone knows you have a bladder the size of your brain" Homer persisted.

Lisa just tuned out homer with her cd player.

"If she won't take me to the bathroom, then I'll sneak out myself," Homer said with a grin. He slowly unbuckled and

melted out of his seat. He snuck into the bathroom.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh," he sighed. He walked out of the bathroom with a silly grin on his face. "Just wait until Lisa hears I went to

the bathroom by myself and didn't get in trouble," he recited.

Then a huge man grabbed him and threw him in a closet.

"Okay, you are my hostage. You just do what I tell you" the terrorist demanded.

"Yay! I'm important." Homer exclaimed.

"Shhhhh. Be quiet." the terrrorist warned.

"Okay. Yay! I'm important," Homer whispered.

"Don't talk. Say kapeesh if you understand."

"But you said not to talk."

"Just... Al-Queda doesn't pay enough," the terrorist said as he left.

Homer walked out. The pilot came up to him and asked, "Do you want to see me drive this?"

"Sure," Homer agreed. They walked into the cockpit. Homer glued the pilot's hand to the steering wheel.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! We are going to die!" yelled the pilot.

Homer ran out and sat in his seat.

"Dad, where have you been?" Lisa asked.

"Oh, just going to the bathroom. And guess what? I didn't even get in trouble!" Homer bragged, as they felt a huge thump.

Next chapter:The hotel


	4. the hotel

"Geeez, this guy didn't even try to take us to the airport. He just dumped us in the middle of this field! How rude!" Homer exclaimed.

"Dad, you did glue his hand to the steering wheel. That was kinda rude," Lisa pointed out.

"Quiet, Lisa" Homer sneered.

Homer and Lisa were riding in a taxi to their hotel.

"Okay, here is your hotel." the taxi driver said.

"Thanks," Homer and Lisa said together.

As they tried to leave, "Hey, you have to pay. You do know that?" asked the taxi driver.

"See if these will work!" Homer shouted, throwing cards at the taxi driver.

"Hey! These are buisness cards!" yelled the taxi driver.

"I'm sure one of them will pay you!" Homer screamed.

In the hotel, Homer and Lisa went to check in.

"You are in room 1. That is straight down the hall," the receptionist told them.

"Hey, this is an all expenses paid trip! I want a penthouse room. And don't tell me you can't!" Homer remarked.

"But sir, people live in there," replied the receptionist.

"But nothing. This isn't a house, a duplex, an apartment building, or a gutter! People shouldn't live here!" yelled Homer.

"Okay, I will just give you the keys to there. I am sure they can spend the week somewhere else," said the receptionist.

"Hee hee hee hee," laughed Homer. "Those kids just rode a cart to the candy counter, and now one of them is hitting on the candy counter girl!"

"Dad, I know this is humorous, but lets just go to our room," Lisa insisted.

"Sir, do you need a bellhop?" asked the receptionist.

"Yes, make sure he is foreign and goes up the stairs. I have my 100 pound bowling ball collection in my bags and I don't want them exposed to elevator music" Homer ordered.

"I heard," a bellhop answered.

"Oh yeah, lady? Here is a tip," Homer offered as the lady stuck out her hand. "Use conditioner to make your hair soft and bouncy just like mine."

"Sir, that is not why I stuck out my hand," countered the receptionist.

"Oh yeah," Homer remembered.

Homer poured superglue all over her hands and placed it on the phone.

"Run, Lisa!" Homer screamed. "See you later sucker!"

The End

Next chapter, the room


	5. The room

I know it has been a long time, but I am BACK

I know it has been a long time, but I am BACK!

"Ahhh, this room is nice. I wonder if repainting the room would count as expenses. I kind of don't like this pale color arrangement. I wonder if they make a color that combines bright orange, bright yellow, and bright green," Homer thought out loud.

"Dad, having the expenses cover the surgery of the check-in lady is pushing it already. I don't think that you want to push the American Indian Society too far. They did kill all of Custer's men without losing any of there own," Lisa said as she looked up from her book.

"Pshhh, what are they going to do? From what I learned from television, they all start crying like some emo kid anytime someone drops a can of pop on the ground," Homer sneered. "Now I know what would look good on the room! Superglue!"

"NO, DAD, DON'T!"

"Too late Lisa. Though, you have to admit it looks good. I'm just glad that I remembered to paint the outside of the door too," A single knock resounds through the entire room. "Oooooooooooooo, my room service must be here. Mmmmmm, bell hops aaaachg," Homer squealed.

"Can anyone tell me why my hand is stuck to the door?" a squeaky voice asked.

"I'm coming, I'm coming. Hmmm, I wonder if it is too late to paint the doorknobs?" Homer opens the door. The squeaky voiced teenager flies into the room, attached to the center of the door. "Geeesh, you bell hops just want to barge into our rooms. Now where's our food?"

"Out there on the cart, now could you get some solvent?" asked the teen.

"Just let me eat my food first," Homer takes in the food and slams the door shut. "Maybe if you were less rude, you would get a tip!" Homer yelled. Homer begins to gorge himself on the many carts of food the bellhop had taken to their room. Lisa also joins in on the feeding frenzy.

1 hour later….

"Aaaaaaaaaa, that hit the spot," Lisa said.

"You got that right. Now let's go to sleep," Homer yawned. Homer and Lisa curl up in their respective beds.

"Could someone help me, I'm getting kind of hungry," the teen screeched.

"Shut up! Some of us are trying to sleep here!" Homer yelled back. He grabbed on of the carts, ran out the door, and repeatedly rammed it into the bell hop until he fell unconscious. Ambulance sirens begin sounding in the background. Lisa flinches but quickly returns to her previous position.

"You're under arrest; you have the right to remain silent…"

Next chapter: In the city


End file.
